Some families produce boy children who are butchers. Others turn out teams of builders, teachers, doctors or diary farmers. My family has made rappers. My three brothers are MCs, the founders of a rap dynasty. Their stage names are Erik Ultimate, Minnestroni (or Kidz with Gunz) and Rap Authoritar. The collective noun for the three of them on stage together is da xxxclusiv brevrin. A sample line is: ‘Ent-er Ber-muda the tri-angle of rock / weak MCs they’re never comin back.’

The newest star of the three, the rap baby, is Joseph, my 27-year-old godson. He was born three days before I turned fourteen. I left home four years later so we didn’t grow up together. We were in different families.