so you think you’ve been having a rough trot eh? feeling a bit beserk. spill yourself out in too many places too fast. all ya feelings running down the moving hills of those who couldnt stay long enough to notice. and neither could you. remember what Liv Ullman said in Face to Face — at least my feelings come directly from myself. thought it sounded good didnt you. thought it was the truth, sitting securely alone in the dark silence of the cinema. but you know its a trick of words. leads you too close. you show too much and there’s nothing left to show. got to lay your feelings at an angle. sincerity sounds good. but it smells bad coming out of the mouth.
the mouth yeah. forgot about the mouths of others. didn’t it surprise you when the baby face moved her chair out of the doorway close to ya games and said have you got a chip on your shoulder. did she see right thru your party tricks or was she simply talking to herself. trying to crack you down in the room full of women maybe just because you didnt say hello. you answered her with the angle of your axe. just following the metaphor thru. no, you answered. not a chip, got a log on my shoulder, or maybe a forest on m’ back. then you left. aware of the value of a climax.
there is a need for angles you realise. next day you see the wide white eagle cloud stretched quiet across the sky, pointed it out to the others sitting there looking down each other’s eyes. dont get lost in the tunnels. its such a nice day.
and the second last person you said you loved. came out of your mouth because the silence seemed too much to endure. you hadnt quite got there with your bodies so you used words instead. and you knew as soon as you spoke of love there was no love. you hadnt meant it. but it was easier to say it than face the hollowness inside you. blocked out the smells of dislike. you didnt know about angles then.
it doesnt take long to get a compass moving.